Wow. I am really pretentious.

Pat O'Brien knows nothing. He's on the Hell express.

I’ve always defined myself as a writer, I’ve never decided what it was I was gonna write. I always fancied myself one, but I’m not. I’m so far from a writer.

I actually got the part. And I thought, Well, I’ll do it for a while. I’ll just quit if it’s stupid.

I didn’t really feel 100 percent comfortable until we started working on the 2004 election.

I really think of it – acting and writing and producing, whatever – as shipping. You gotta ship. Put the widget together in the easiest, quickest way possible and ship the product.

I remember interviewing someone I actually felt bad for, and therefore didn’t want to take an ironic stance against him. It actually turned out to be a really funny piece.

I don’t know how this company got the name National Shakespeare Company, because it was literally like retards employing retards.

The first year or so on The Daily Show is pretty intense in terms of travel. You’re going to the worst places in the country, talking to the craziest people in the world.

People want other people to know that they share our sensibility even if they’re not exactly sure what that sensibility is.